Finally, pens that say what you wish you could.

This glorious set of 5 black ink ballpoint pens is perfect for anyone whos ever had to fake a smile while explaining that yes, the coupon expired in 2003. Each pen is a tiny beacon of emotional honesty, perfect for your desk, your apron pocket, or passive-aggressively handing to your manager during a quick chat.

Each pen has one of these gems written on them:

THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS WRONG
OUTWARD SMILES, INWARD SCREAMS
SORRY, I’M ON MY BREAK
I DON’T KNOW. I JUST WORK HERE
HERE TO HELP! JK, PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE

Give them to your coworkers. Keep them all for yourself. Use them to sign return forms with a flourish of justified rage. Either way, theyre your new emotional support pens.

Black ink. Ballpoint. 100% petty.